Originally posted on FetLife in 2012 but slightly re-edited for posting here.

A perennial topic in BDSM circles is predators and what to do about them. Rather than rehash the same dry statistics and the same very good advice, I thought I’d attempt to put a humorous face on something we should all be vigilant for. I’ve used masculine pronouns for convenience, not because I think predators are all men.

Many of you reading this probably recognize specific people in each archetype. It is not my intent to hold up a mirror to anyone; they’re called archetypes for a reason. Unfortunately, each of these archetypes hews close to a harmless version that is almost exactly the same, with a huge difference in intent.

One of my greatest fears as an outspoken community member and Dominant is that I’ll be mistaken for or the victim of a smear campaign making me out to be one of these archetypes. After all, most of us share similarities with each of them. Be vigilant and never accuse without evidence.

How to Spot a Predator:

The conventional wisdom has it that predators are always male, usually white, and mostly uneducated. Unfortunately, predators come in all sizes, shapes, colors, economic classes, and species, even when they conform so closely to one of the archetypes below that it seems they’re using a character kit from Predator: the Bullshitting.

Continue reading “Spotting a Predator: a mildly amusing look at a serious topic”